Have you ever felt as if very few people actually like you? If nothing you do is acceptable unless someone else approves of it? Do you feel inferior and crave for the acceptance of others? Do your accomplishments feel negligible compared to what others have accomplished? Have you been thrown in at the deep end and do not feel up to the task given to you? Have you been bullied in the past and told that you are a nobody? Are you ignored or find it difficult to fit in? 

What could be the cause of these feelings, why do I believe I am not worthy?

I can be

• The victim of circumstances: Trauma or exposure to long-term stress could have taken its toll on you
• The victim of others: Taking the criticism of others, especially when they have a position of power or influence over you (e.g. a teacher, parent, boss, spouse or even your child), too personally
• The victim of myself : Self-criticism taken too far can destroy you

We all desire the acceptance, respect and appreciation of others. But do you know what? If you want to wait until you get it from everybody, it is going to be a long wait. Everyone has his or her own idea of how other people should be and you will never be able to satisfy everybody. You cannot allow others to determine who you are and how happy and how fulfilled you will be. No one can make you have an opinion of yourself that you do not want. In fact, acceptance of you as a worthy person starts with yourself. The more you like and love yourself, the more others will pick up on this and love and respect you back.

What is the truth? 

I am worthy because

• God says so.

You made us a little lower than you yourself, and you have crowned us with glory and honor.   You let us rule everything your hands have made. And you put all of it under our power.

Psalms 8:5‭-‬6 CEV

God Himself says to Moses “I AM WHO I AM” and the same applies to us.

God said to Moses, “ I AM WHO I AM”; and He said, “You shall say this to the Israelites, ‘I AM has sent me to you.’ ”

Exodus 3:14 AMP

• I am an human being – we are all equal and have a right to live. 

• I also have my own victories and accomplishments. The world may not be willing to pay a lot of money for them but that is not the point. I am making the world a better place little by little and that is what matters. Do I believe in myself?

How do I fix this?

It starts with me. I have to make a decision to resist these feelings and do something about them. I must not allow these feelings to live inside myself and determine my level of happiness. I should get help if it is too difficult to do this by myself.

• In cases of trauma or exposure to long-term stress, I will need to go for therapy.
• Start to understand my weak points. Work on them but accept them for now. Overcome them through self-compassion.
  Know thyself, be thyself, love thyself. – from ancient Greek
  
• Stop criticizing and evaluating myself. Life is not perfect and everybody will run into adversities from time to time. 
• Take responsibility for my mistakes. As long as I believe everything is someone else’s mistake, I will never be able to recognise or correct my own mistakes and they will always return to me.
• It is not so much becoming someone than rather being fully who I already am.
• Trust in the Lord. 
• I cannot expect others to like me, or have compassion for me, if I do not like, or have compassion, for myself.
• Be more open and honest about the things from my past that I am ashamed of. It will make me free and will give others, with similar challenges, permission to do the same. 
• It is not about what I should still do, but what I should let go of. 

To be yourself in a world that is constantly trying to make you something else is the greatest accomplishment

Ralph Waldo Emerson

God loves you unconditionally and, likewise, you should love yourself and others. 

All of this takes courage. 

Christ gives me the strength to face anything.

Philippians 4:13 CEV