In this materialistic world of ours these are probably the subjects that you would be first to neglect when you are pressed for time and fail to recognize their importance. Without developing in these areas your view of life could be limited, uninspiring, selfish, unhappy and unsuccessful if not depressing. You need to spend some time, on a regular basis, with

• yourself alone: During these times you take your life into perspective and discover who you really are: Why am I here? Are my values based on true principles? Addressing your inner fears, hopes and goals. Contemplating the lives and struggles of others you care for. These are accomplished through quiet time, retreats, journalling, self-study and the like.
  • Quiet time: You need to spend time alone every day. The purpose is to separate yourself daily, for a short while, from your busy life to enable you to gain perspective on the bigger picture. During this time you can contemplate your life, study the Bible and pray to God. Through His written Word (the Bible) and what He tells you in your heart during prayer, you learn what He has in mind for you. You will learn about the things you need to change in your life, how you can improve your life by adjusting your values to match His principles and learn about the short and long term goals and purpose He has for you. This should be followed up with obedience – but more on that in a follow-up article. This is the core of a personal relationship with God. Quiet time takes as long as you need. If you are new to the concept, take 5 minutes each day. Increase your time with God as it grows on you. Try to make it more or less at the same time each day. Usually, first thing in the morning is the best time, but it depends on your circumstances. This is one of those good habits you need to have in your life. Make time for one of those important (i.e. only later in life you will realize its importance) but not urgent (i.e. nothing forces you to start today, therefore, you usually postpone until tomorrow) tasks in life.
  • Journalling: Many people do not see the need for journalling or are afraid that others will read about their most personal feelings. In either case the power of journalling is not appreciated. Journalling allows you to stand back, gain perspective on your life and learn from it. Certain things in our lives happen or develop at a very slow rate and our memory is usually too short to remember the details of a long time ago. By keeping notes of special memories, you are able to refer back to these later which will enable you to see the bigger picture. By studying your journal entries, you will find the golden thread of God’s plan for your life. You will find that your life consists of phases, what the purpose of each phase is and the fact that your life will eventually move on to the next phase. It is good to keep notes of good ideas you had, inspiring quotes you read, personal victories you had, answered prayers, goals achieved, affirmation received, lessons learnt, special memories and any other wisdom, thoughts and reflections that were of value to you at the time. These will all be invaluable to you later. Even if you feel you do not want to share these notes with anyone else during your life time and just use them for your own personal development, can you imagine what they could mean to your children and grand children one day? This will be part of your legacy, enabling your descendants to learn from your life. You could even use your journal to help you write your autobiography one day. Practical tips on starting your own journal can be found here.
  • Retreats: this is a longer version of quiet time when you go away from home to a place where you can be alone, uninterrupted, for at least 2 days, if possible. Do this as frequently as you need it, but preferably at least once a year. The time can also be used for prayer and Bible meditation but there will be enough undisturbed time now to reflect on your life and God’s purpose for you. Annual goal setting and planning can also be done at an annual retreat. It is a good idea to reset yourself properly during this time: sleep until you are well rested, fast or detox by just drinking water or just eating fruit and nuts or abstain from whatever you want to detox yourself from. You will gain control again over the rat race of life and by doing this you will experience feelings of peace, purity and self-control. This will give you the necessary focus on God and your true self, enabling you to hear His purposes for you. During retreats you may find God’s calling for you personally. Make notes of everything you hear and decide. You will need to refer back to these once you are back in the rat race of life.
  • Self-study: You will gain a lot of insight into life (especially your own) and enable yourself to grow if you spend some time on self-study material. You can read good books and web sites as well as watch and listen to inspirational DVDs and audio recordings (why be stuck in traffic every day without using the time to listen to a good audio recording?). Keep note of which books you have read and what you have watched in case you want to refer back to it later or if you need to point someone else to it. A good book to read on the subject of understanding yourself (it also contains simple, though excellent, exercises) is Finding Square Holes by Anita Houghton.
• mentors or friends: These are people that can support you and help you grow. These relationships are much deeper than those with your normal friends. These special people care about your spiritual and emotional well-being. They will support you when you are down. They will give you renewed hope and faith when yours has faded. They will inspire and equip you to grow. Make sure to meet such people and plan time to spend with them. They will make an indispensable difference in your life. You are likely to find such special people in your local church and support groups. Some support groups are part of a local church, others are independent of any particular denomination. Some are organised around a mutual interest or common attribute of the group members e.g. all members are part of the church band or they are all men. The support you can get from (and give to!) a group of like-minded people who care for you should not be underestimated.